Step Thirteen

We follow the principle that when the student is ready, the teacher will appear. The witness of our lives is the only message we need to carry to others.

Step Thirteen is one of my favorite steps but also a step I struggle with. I like the idea Step Thirteen implies that we do not have to evangelize the world or even our neighborhoods. This thought alone brings freedom from the idea that if I don’t save my fellowman, he may not have a happy afterlife. This step removes guilt and places it squarely on the correct shoulders. We are not responsible for someone else’s spiritual journey. We might want to help others—a noble idea—but our help is our choice, and their response is theirs.

One reason I struggle with this step is because I want the Religious Recovery program to succeed, and so I feel personally responsible for its success or its failure. According to Step Thirteen, when the student is ready — and not before — the teacher will appear. The role of the teacher is simply to share his or her light and allow the student to make their own decisions.

Trying to create students in our own image is not the goal. Our goal is to help students find their own spiritual path, and to learn from them as they learn from us. We constantly change roles from student to teacher and back again. When we are ready to receive more Light our teacher will appear, and let’s not be surprised to learn that our teachers are often our own students.